All posts by Pearl Grey

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Small Revelations

Ralph are you telling me you’ve NEVER heard of Spinal Tap? How is this possible? You’re 42. I’m five years younger than you and I know about Spinal Tap. My God, the next thing I know you’ll be telling me you love Meatloaf. Oh good

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Soul Mate 2.0

Welcome to Love-Match! We know you have a choice of many providers and we are so pleased to receive your business. We understand just how darn tricky it is to find The One and we think you’ll find that our services are carried out with

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Monday Blur

I woke up shivering in the middle of a dark construction site with headlights from a roaring tractor pointed at me. My head was throbbing and my left arm was sticky and damp. It appeared that I was about to be run over and pulverised

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Happy Family

Happy birthday my ass!  What’s happy about it? What do you want me to say? Should I regale you with all the gory details of the beatings and the screaming?  Would it be therapeutic if I told you that sometimes I welcomed the beatings?  Hey,

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The Walk

Yippee we’re going to the forest!   A new harness and a new lead? Oh wow! I wish I was bigger so I could cover your face in kisses! Oooooh the forest smells amazing!   Sniff, sniff, sniff. Mmmmm dog butts. Mmmmm horse poop. Nice. This is