Sin-Away©
Squashed a spider?
Ran a red light?
Sinned against God and your fellow man?
Got yourself a one-way ticket to the fiery pits of hell?
Well, here at Sin-Away© we believe that a little wrong doing shouldn’t have to result in a life of eternal damnation!
Stolen from the offertory basket? Worry not! Our patented, quick ‘n’ easy ‘Shadow-transferal’ technology means that you no longer have to burden yourself under the weight of all of those silly little annoying sinny-wins.
Broken your brother-in-laws legs? Don’t sweat it! Our crack-team of specially-ordained Holy Fathers are on call 24/7 to exorcise your most indutiable inequities.
Blown up a train station? No problem. With Sin-Away© your shadow takes the blame, so while your shady counterpart is dragged screaming to the feet of Beelzebub, your sinless soul will be supping a cool bottle of suds up in the clouds with ole Saint Nick.
And, for a limited time only, achieve absolution for an absolute bargain with this angelic offer. Simply book your Sin-Away© session before 6pm on the 6th June and not only will you become instantly guilt free, interest free, but you will also receive 50% off the extraction of any further malefactory misdemeanors.
So don’t delay – call today.
Sin-Away©, the only way to repent
Tim Waltho
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