Spot the Difference

There’s something great about taking the tube. That element of danger; the hundreds of different passengers; going southbound when you meant to go north.

As you descend the escalators, you get a sneak preview of all the adverts you’re going to see 10 times bigger on the platform and throughout London when you emerge. It’s easy to see what new films and albums are coming out and whose offering the best deals on personal injury claims.

As you head towards the platform, you come across several buskers that seem more interested in entertaining you than their own gain. You’re surrounded by jostling, impatient people but there’s something reassuring about it. It’s the best indicator that you’ve made it to London and the fun is about to begin.

You never have to wait too long for the next tube train to arrive. It usually turns up just as you’re starting to wander about the ins and outs of falling on to the track.

But the best thing about the tube has got to be how quickly you’re ferried to your destination. If there’s a more efficient method of public transport, I’d like to see it!

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There’s something terrifying about taking the tube. That element of danger; the hundreds of different passengers; going southbound when you meant to go north.

As you descend the escalators, you’re bombarded with advertising. Images and stupid slogans that you’ll see over and over again throughout your time in the Capital.

As you head towards the platform, you come across several buskers that seem to be auditioning for the X Factor. They’re clearly feckless middle class students trying to top up their dwindling trust funds. By now, the pushing and shoving is well under way – proof, if you needed it, that you’ve left the civilised world far behind.

Why doesn’t every station have those glass track protector things? Luckily, you don’t have too long to watch the rats and involuntarily think of suicide.

I can’t decide what the worst thing about the journey is; the claustrophobic tunnels and carriages? Thinking about bombs and devastation and carnage? The weight of an entire city barring down upon your head?

There must be a more efficient method of public transport?

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