I feel old and tired and about ready to give up.
The shower was cleansing but there was no sense of revival. I clamber over the bath and watch myself emerge in the foggy mirror. I can only just make out my face but I’m surprised by how…ordinary I look. It’s been a tough year so far. One long series of mistakes and regrets.
It’s so hard to keep up a sunny disposition. That’s the most exhausting part of all of this. I don’t even know who I’m pretending for. Everyone has their problems but these are mine! Why do I hide them away? Why am I always so fucking accommodating?!
I wish the past could be wiped away as easily as condensation on a steamed mirror.