Song for Chad

Contributed by on 13/05/10

Inspired by Nickelback, I offer the following tribute to romance:

I’m a loser and I suck real bad

I hide it from the world

But inside I’m so sad

Oh, oh, oh, how could you ever love me

I drink a lot of alcohol

So, I act like a total ass

Nothing rhymes with alcohol

Christ, I’m a douche

You don’t have to love me

Just feel sorry for me

‘Cause I do

‘Cause I do

My dad spanked me once

When I was three

It really hurt

Now I’ll never be free

Mommy never loved me

You could just tell

She threw away all my drawings

And she laughed when I fell

You don’t have to love me

Just feel sorry for me

‘Cause I do

‘Cause I do

Ever since you left me

My life has been shit

It’s, like, meaningless and empty

Can’t you come back

Please?

You’re pretty

You don’t have to love me

Just feel sorry for me

‘Cause I do

‘Cause I do

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3 comments so far

  1. lol, i love this. VERY funny .b.x

    Reply


  2. I think we’ve all met guys like Chad. Nice change of pace; part song, part poem, dedicated to the self-absorbed and narcissistic. I like how it takes a more light-hearted form, but the subject matter is very serious.

    Reply


  3. Loved this Breens. ‘Nothing rhymes with alcohol’ was a tea-spitting moment. (Had I been drinking tea.)

    Reply

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