My Broken Life
Contributed by
iansharman on 10/11/09
The old, cracked
Broken steps
Where your head
Cracked
Broken steps
Where I watched
You
F
A
L
L
Cracked
Broken steps.
I left, your
Broken heart
Where I killed
Your
Broken heart
Where I watched
Us
B
R
E
A
K
Your
Broken Heart.
I forgot, my
Broken life
Where I left
My
Broken life
Where I watched
Me
L
O
S
E
My
Broken life.
dan lester
This moved me.
Reply
Rivka Jacobs
Forceful, stark, with anger behind the words. Some excellent poetry, Ian! Evocative use of words to convey the raw emotion behind the verses. Did this flow out of you, or, did you chisel this out of your thoughts, so to speak. There’s symmetry and strength and real skill in your use of words.
Very powerful work!
Reply
Nicolas Papaconstantinou
At this point, I’m not sure whether applause or some form of intervention would be a more appropriate response.
I’ll stick with the applause?
Reply
Andrew Cheverton
Yes – applause.
Reply