Lives In The Woods

Contributed by on 26/06/09

On June 7th, 2009, administrative records show that city coroners issued no death certificates within the borough of Brooklyn. Hospital records, when cross-referenced, indicate that a woman was removed from life support at 4AM that morning. This statistical anomaly is lent greater curiosity at 7:36AM, and again at 9:13PM when two more patients are removed by their families from life-support apparatus. According to paperwork, the first woman is unable to breathe on her own, the second patient has a mechanical heart, and the third is suffering complete organ failure in her kidneys and liver. All pass at approximately the same time on the morning of June 8th.

On May 24th, 2003, a sheriff’s deputy in Hot Springs, Arkansas is shot by two criminals fleeing the scene of a failed robbery. He remains conscious as a passer-by drives him to the hospital. Doctors are later at odds to explain amongst themselves why the deputy had not suffocated from the blood they removed from his lungs, already clotted.

On September 17th, 1997, a group of huntsmen in the Black Forest of Germany tell their wives about birds that simply staggered away after being pelted with buckshot. Unable to prove their stories, the women chalk it up to another lost weekend spent drinking with the boys. Birds are later found dead of no apparent cause, until autopsies reveal the presence of spent ammunition within the birds, healed over.

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