Was This Last Month?
“No, you’re not allowed to do that. It’s not considered original anymore. My dad has done it,” Todd said. “You didn’t even wear glasses.”
“I don’t own any glasses.” Francis looked down in shame.
“Doesn’t Superman have like, twenty-negative twenty vision?” Cherie looked pleased with herself. Francis looked relieved someone was, if not exactly on his side, at least not on Todd’s.
“Cherie, honey, I don’t think you know how vision works. Also, he still wears glasses as Clark Kent. Also, this is men talking,” Todd gently rebuked her. Cherie stormed off.
“I wish you wouldn’t do that,” Francis mumbled. “I’m the one who’s going to have to smooth it over and listen to her bitch about my friends all being mean to her tonight.”
“It wouldn’t have happened if you had worn a real costume,” Todd reminded him. “Do you see Michael? No. You don’t. Because he came as Peter Parker, and I sent him home. He thought I was joking, but I took his beer, and I sent him home. Granted, I don’t like Michael, but the fact remains, I have set a precedent. If you half-ass your costume, you will leave. I don’t want you to have to leave.”
Francis clutched his beer closer.
“You have to do something high-concept. I’m giving you a chance, because I like you. Cherie saved your ass, if anything. First, she didn’t come as slutty-nurse, slutty-teacher, slutty-librarian, slutty-cop or slutty-schoolgirl. Which puts her seventy-eight steps above almost every other girl at this party.” Todd leaned in to Francis, as the music shifted. His voice grew quieter.
“She also, in her own adorable way, gave you an out. She mentioned the differences between Superman and Clark Kent. If you can find a new take on this duality, I will not only let you stay, I will provide a designated driver for you, unlike Michael, who I called the cops on anonymously, and reported his car for drunk driving.”
Later, when Cherie finally returned Francis’s calls, he explained to her that Superman getting out of the phone booth without any pants on probably wasn’t the best costume choice he had ever made. There was good news, though, if she’d stop crying.
They’d been invited to Todd’s Christmas party, and it was a masquerade!
Budgie
Clever… and nice ending.
Reply
Matthew Hartwell
Thank you, Budgie, we miss you already!
Reply
Andrew Cheverton
“Do you see Michael? No. You don’t. Because he came as Peter Parker, and I sent him home.”
Hahahahahaha!!
Reply
Matthew Hartwell
I can’t tell if I’m Francis or Todd, which may explain why I simultaneously loathe and love parties.
Reply
Nicolas Papaconstantinou
Ha! I like that you managed to find a way to have a Halloween story so late in the year. Also, that it’s so funny…
Well done, sir. A champion piece of work!
Reply
Matthew Hartwell
Thank you very much!
I was talking to a friend of mine in med-school, and they just had their Halloween party last weekend because of 3 weeks of exams. I was extremely jealous, because I like to go to as many Halloween parties as possible.
Reply