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Captain Scorpio

Contributed by Chris Beckett on 28/07/08

Captain Scorpio had been chasing the minions of H.A.D.E.S. (Hellions Against Deifying Everything Sacred) for years, criss-crossing the globe, deciphering their clues, always one step behind. Jack Scorpio was the latest in a long line of V.I.R.T.U.E. (Vigorously Intense Resistance To Ultimate Evil) agents tasked with the discovery and neutralization of H.A.D.E.S. But in nearly fifteen years, he had yet to see one of his enemies, let alone capture them. This was not an extraordinary turn of events as the search for H.A.D.E.S. agents had turned up nothing for close to three centuries. They were slick bastards.

However, recent weeks had offered a breakthrough for the Captain. The transmoderators back at V.I.R.T.U.E. headquarters had created an airborne computer virus programmed to seek out and infect H.A.D.E.S. mainframes. Anomalies culled from the myriad clues Scorpio had already solved along with a cross-referencing of all pertinent materials from the HA.D.E.S. casefiles had allowed the tech specialists a unique insight into the workings of this nefarious group. This virus would insinuate itself into the H.A.D.E.S. computers and upload all files from these mainframes, replacing them with doctored files from old NSA records that had been released in the middle of the 21st century when the United States government finally admitted to its faulty intelligence during the global war on terror.

Now, Captain Scorpio was less than half a step behind the operatives, and closing in fast. The latest clue had been easily deciphered with the help of their new intelligence:

Overgrown with a single break in its side,
Appearing solid without; within secrets hide.

Scorpio was on his way to a theme park in Prince Edward Island, Canada where a hedge labyrinth – and the next clue – awaited him.

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Jack Scorpio walked among the crowds with determination. He didn’t want to squander this bit of fortune and made his way directly for the labyrinth that lay at the far end of the theme park – a park given over to models of many of the most famous castles and architectural wonders from across the pond in England. Looking at the tiny map, he noted there were even miniatures of Shakespeare’s home from Stratford on Avon. But this was no day for sightseeing, Captain Scorpio needed to find the latest H.A.D.E.S. clue and move on.

Eyeing the tall hedges on the far side of a moat, Scorpio picked up his pace and started to weave in between the children wandering about with their parents. They didn’t seem to notice him, oblivious to anything but their cotton candy and jumbo sodas.

Scorpio stopped in front of the entrance to the hedge and peered about, wondering if an agent from H.A.D.E.S. might be watching him yet. But nobody stood out – which would make sense. If they’d been obvious about their dealings, V.I.R.T.U.E. would have taken care of them by now.

Satisfied that he was not being watched, Scorpio entered the labyrinth. He went left, walking to the far end of the maze, and then turned right, making for the heart. Soon the path diverged, with three options, and Scorpio took the right path, following its jagged track as a series of ninety degree turns led him further into the labyrinth. After five such angles, Scorpio came to a dead end. His first thought was to turn around and backtrack, but he could hear voices on the other side of the hedge wall where he was standing and chose to see if he could bend the rules a bit.

Peering through the tangle of branches beneath the covering of green, Jack Scorpio pushed his shoulder into the hedge and tried to shove his way through. He’d gotten most of his arm into the thicket when an electrical shock ran up his arm and shuddered through his body. The voltage seized his muscles, causing the V.I.R.T.U.E. agent to collapse in the dirt, wheezing as his heart pounded in his chest. The pain was alarming, but it was the sudden inability of Scorpio to control his body that was most disconcerting to the man.

The effects of the blast wore off quickly, but the lesson remained. Scorpio wasn’t sure if this was something specifically tuned to his biogenetic code, or if the caretakers of this particular park were just that sick. He leaned toward the former, though his personal philosophy on theme parks did lend itself toward the latter choice, as ludicrous as the “man on the street” might find this.

Picking himself off the ground, Scorpio backtracked and found where he’d turned down this blind alley and decided to go left this time. This option fared him far better than the first, and eventually, after a number of twists and turns, Scorpio found himself with another choice to be made. Again – left, right, or straight. Scorpio chose left and found this path to be free from any stumbling blocks. And somewhere in the back of his mind, Jack remembered something he’d been told about labyrinths (or maybe he’d read it, he could not remember). It was a left-handed maze.

This realization made the rest of his task far easier, and after fifteen minutes (for it was a large labyrinth), Captain Scorpio found himself at the center of the maze. There, for all to see – but for only him to understand – was a message written in what appeared to be an ancient dialect, but which Jack could easily decipher with his V.I.R.T.U.E. uplink. It said:

No pithy clue here. But it’s damn fun trying
to catch us, innit? HAHAHAHAHAHA!
By the way, head to the Empire State Building
and you’ll find your next directive on floor 86

To New York.

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Jack was surprised to find that the Empire State Building wasn’t as easy to find as he expected. Walking along with his head peering into the blue sky, he’d expected the signature building to jump right out at him. But, having once been the tallest building in the city, it was now dwarfed by the giant pillars that scraped the deep azure veil draped across the city. He was staring at a lifesize statue of Spider-Man in a plate glass window (Empire Comics) when he noticed the tell-tale spire in its reflection. Turning around, Jack Scorpio was staring at one of the most famous buildings in the world, and it looked out of place surrounded by its younger, but taller siblings.

Scorpio weaved between the yellow cabs and other motorists that raced down the blacktop, almost losing his leg in one encounter. Luckily, he’d recently had his physical with the V.I.R.T.U.E. medical team and had been offered enhanced reflex modifications for his bio-suit.

Stepping through the ornate doors, Scorpio made his way directly to the elevator. After a few minutes wait, he entered the box and punched the button for 86. It took fifteen minutes for him to reach his destination. At floor 86, Captain Scorpio was the only one to exit the elevator. Turning right, he walked down the hall and pulled the first fire alarm he saw. Bells began to clang immediately. People peered out of doorways to see what was going on, not sure whether they should run or wait for some affirmation that: yes, indeed this is an emergency. But within minutes a mass exodus was underway, scores of businessmen and women jostling for the elevators and the stairwell, seemingly unaware of Scorpio as he continued walking in the opposite direction.

When he reached the end of the hall, Scorpio tested the door to his right and found it locked. Pulling his jacket off, he wrapped it around his hand and smashed in the window. Reaching in, he unlocked the door and stepped inside. Within, all Scorpio found was a fairly plain office – a desk, a chair, and a white board on the wall behind. Scorpio had no idea what it had been used for but guessed that it had been set up for him. Stepping over to the desk he discovered a message in small letters on the whiteboard. It read:

Envy will lead you to the truth of your futility
When the twins choose to stop in a berth of the city.

Scorpio uplinked the riddle to headquarters and almost immediately he had an answer. He was heading to the harbor.

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Dock 22 (the twins). A berth in the harbor. Jack Scorpio approached the building cautiously, sure that someone would be waiting for him – someone wishing to take him out.

But there was nobody. Scorpio tested the door – the knob turned easily – and it swung in with a loud creak. The interior was covered in darkness, tiny slits near the top of the twenty foot walls illuminating little more than the dust motes flitting about. The Captain reached out and found a switch on the wall to his left, flipping it on. A soft hum came to him from the rafters and large bulbs slowly came to life. After a minute, Scorpio was able to see the empty floor. It stretched along to every wall, except for one section in the far corner of the building. But Scorpio could not make out what might be piled there.

Footfalls echoed through the hall as the Captain walked across the concrete. Reaching the far side, Jack wasn’t sure if his eyes were playing tricks on him. He reached down to run his fingers over the objects at his feet.

It was a pile of children’s magnetic letters.

V.I.R.T.U.E. had expected something of this nature when he’d uploaded the previous clue, but Scorpio was sure they’d not considered the possibility of children’s toys. Going over the riddle again, the Captain knew that “envy” was the key word. Bending down, he slid the palm of his hands over the cool plastic alphabet, his mind wandering as he thought about his mission.

Ten minutes later it came to him in a burst – something so simple that he wondered why he hadn’t figured it out sooner. “Envy” was green, and he knew – maybe it was instinct or maybe it was just a matter of being in this business for so many years – that if he took out the green letters and re-arranged them, the clue would be revealed. So, Captain Scorpio started sifting.

t-i-o-n-d-f-e-h-t-t-a-s-e-h-r-i-e-o-s-e

Two hours later, Scorpio had it:
Fate is on the other side

He looked up and saw a door he’d not noticed upon entering. It stood along the back wall, and Scorpio knew – in his gut – that the end of his years-long mission lay on the other side of that door. His palms became sweaty as he contemplated what this would mean for him, for V.I.R.T.U.E. It was daunting. He knew once he walked through that door, it would all be over. His reason in this life would be gone, and the thought of having to go on after that scared him.

But he had his directives and he needed to follow through. Standing up, Captain Scorpio marched to the door and turned its handle. It opened on recently greased hinges, sliding away from the Captain effortlessly as he was bathed in light.

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Jack Scorpio wasn’t prepared for what awaited him on the other side of the door. But when realization set in, it all made perverse sense.

Standing before him was his commander, Colonel Gerald McShane. The Colonel looked upon his charge with admiration. But mixed in with that look was a sense of disappointment, like that of a father when he must first confront his child’s dishonesty. McShane raised his pistol, leveled at the Captain’s head.

“You know. We never had anyone discover our duplicity so quickly before. You are to be commended for your perseverance and ability. It will take a while to train your replacement,” said the Colonel.

“There is no H.A.D.E.S., is there?” asked Scorpio.

“Oh, there’s always been a H.A.D.E.S. just as there’s always been V.I.R.T.U.E. But our two groups came to an early understanding that in order to continue filling our coffers, we could never have a successful conclusion to our conflict. Therefore, two of our earliest leaders decided to come together and merge our two companies, privately, while continuing our very public conflict so that recruitment would continue to climb. Only the barest few of our number know of the secret. If it got out, what would happen to our forces? There’d be no reason to continue fighting, and with that, no reason for any of our operatives to be in the field. In short, there would be chaos. So you see, that is why I must dispose of you now.

“Have you any final words?”

“Yes,” said Captain Scorpio. “Why do you villains always insist on a soliloquy at the point when you should be firing your weapon?”

Colonel McShane looked at Scorpio with confusion, a look that was lost seconds later when a laser burned through the roof, disintegrating the Colonel and leaving a dark spot on the floor where he’d been standing.

As soon as the Colonel began speaking, Captain Scorpio had uplinked the audio to the tech guys back at V.I.R.T.U.E. headquarters, hoping they would be as disgusted with this turn of events as he was. Thankfully, they had been of the same mind, taking out the Colonel by homing in on Scorpio’s uplink. It was a risky gambit, but one that worked out.

Now, all Scorpio needed to do was figure out if he would blow the lid off this conspiracy, or take it over himself.

Ah, the possibilities.